Dear GhanaWeb: My wife loaned my savings to her ex-lover and he hasn’t paid back

Dear GhanaWeb,

My wife loaned GH¢40,000 to her ex-lover. I only found out three days ago, and I’m very upset.

She said she thought he would pay back on the date he promised, but it’s been six months and he hasn’t paid anything.

We’ve been married for just two years, and we were saving that money in her account to buy a piece of land this year. Now that it’s time to make the purchase, she knows the money isn’t there, and she’s been silent about it.

She’s been watching me run around trying to make this deal happen, knowing full well that the money is gone.

I finally secured the land and went to her so we could make the payment, only for her to tell me she had less than half of the amount.

She then started crying and confessed she had loaned the money to someone. I insisted on knowing who it was. At first, she wouldn’t say.

She even lied about the person’s identity. But I managed to get to the bottom of it, and the truth came out.

That’s when she finally admitted it was her ex-boyfriend. The one she dated before we met. I’m shocked she’s still in contact with him, enough to loan him money and keep it from me for six months. She once told me she had blocked and deleted his number. Clearly, that wasn’t true.

These past three days have been very difficult for me. I can’t trust her anymore, and I’m deeply unhappy.

Now, I’ve had to forgo the land because I can’t even reach the guy. She claims he’s out of town and is asking me to give her more time to contact him.

But I don’t believe he’ll pay. Isn’t this enough reason to consider divorce? It’s obvious she’s not ready to build with me. We had plans, and she’s gone behind my back and destroyed them.

I’m drained, emotionally and financially. I’ve worked so hard for this land. That money represented every pesewa I’ve saved since we got married. We agreed to keep it in her account because, if it stayed in mine, daily expenses would eat into it. And now, of all people, she gave it to her ex?

I’m devastated. She’s pregnant, so I’m trying to stay calm and not act on some of the thoughts in my head. But the betrayal cuts deep. I don’t even know what to do anymore.

I’m seriously considering divorce, but I don’t know if it’s the right decision. It’s clear to me she’s not over her ex, and I now have to start all over again. I need help. Please, what should I do!?

FG/MA

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